Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Bagels with ease

Lox, eggs, and onions. Bagel with cream cheese. Coffee. Three fabulous women. Adult conversation. All the time in the world, well, practically. A week later after my kids started school and here I am doing just fine and it feels damn good. Last week I felt like a disoriented odd woman that was suddenly pushed out of a familiar life and into someone else's, and now I'm well on my way to figuring out the new me, or at least headed in a nice direction. And, a minor event like breakfast with empathizing girlfriends going through the same thing helps in such unexpected ways.

Our five kids that have practically grown up together, are at different schools, with different approaches to learning, but we can come together and share our experiences. One attends a conservative religious school, the others are at a charter school with two special needs children in each classroom, and our charter school is very progressive and unique in it's approach. But, we can all wonder together why my kids suddenly decided that they don't like peanut butter because it's too "thicky" (???), and another mom, wait, let's go back to the peanut butter thing. Peanut butter and jelly sandwich, okay, it's a basic and easy classic staple that they could eat every day until a week ago and now the PB&J's are off the list. Oh, and cheese is on the refusal list, too. Cheese! I understand they are trying to assert themselves and have some control because that's what five-year-olds do, but come on little people?! Pick, oh, I don't know, cucumbers or something that doesn't really affect the regular menu one way or another? Okay, okay, I know, let it go. It will pass. Moving on... We can all smile at the story about how my friend's girls really like a sweet girl in their class with Downs Syndrome and are showing a beautiful amount of fondness and understanding toward her. And how my getting-braver-and-stronger-every-day friend fought tooth and nail to get her husband to agree to enrolling her daughter in kindergarten (he didn't think she needed it) and now her daughter is thriving and loving it and it's all because she didn't give up for one minute and stood up for what she believed was right for her daughter. She even asked for and got a "you were right and I was wrong" admission! Hooray! And, we didn't only talk about the kids, but about politics, husbands, cars, crazy people, etc., and all of this in the middle of a weekday! Without childsitters!

So, there I was, silly me, feeling like this adjustment period was all about me and my own struggle to figure it all out, and yes, that's somewhat true, but it's also about all of us being there for each other, and thank goodness we now have time for those moments to remind us that we aren't totally alone in this after all.

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